Friday, November 5, 2010
How To Spot A Fool.
Here is a framed picture of a fool.
The frame is actually very nice: I like the color.
But - to be honest - the frame is not that important.
And - to be honest - neither is the fool.
You are probably thinking: "well that's really easy to recognize."
And you would be right, if all fools looked like this.
Unfortunately they don't.
Annoyingly, fools come in all shapes and sizes.
Some don't even speak English.
Many of them wear glasses, but even that does not always hold true.
So how do you spot a fool?
The first rule is: Never go by appearances.
It is far more reliable to listen to what they say.
Do they speak as if they are an expert on the subject?
If they do, they are unlikely to be fools.
Do they speak rapidly and listen rarely, if at all?
Nope. Probably not a fool.
Do they tend to judge others without knowing squat about them?
Again, that's a normal person.
N.B: I would like to introduce two abbreviations here:
PWANF. (People Who Are Not Fools). And: PWAF. (People Who Are Fools).
So. Where were we?
So far we have talked only about how to spot PWANFs.
Which is actually the inverse of what we should be doing, which is learning how to spot PWAFs.
So here is a PWAF-spotting guide.
Often looks like anybody else, but has better balance.
Dresses in an uncool manner, since coolness is an unknown concept to them.
Fails to back away from dangerous situations where other people would.
Speaks clearly, directly and adds no unnecessary filler-words or cliches.
(Often to the point where normal people become uncomfortable, even paranoid).
Drives a car at, or beneath the posted speed limit.
Leaves a sizable space between his car and the car in front.
Brakes to avoid beetles, snakes, birds and anything that lives.
Stubbornly refuses to watch TV sitcoms, and Simpsons repeats.
Doesn't know who is the current top Ice Hockey team.
And, most telling of all: displays that outdated old thing called "common-sense".
So basically, that is how you can spot a fool.
Which begs the question: Why would you want to spot a fool?
Hehe: it's a trick question :)
If you don't know who is a fool and who isn't, well, what does that make you?
So always bear in mind:
Fools can resemble the picture above.
They almost never act like you do.
And they just act...weird.
It really is that simple!